verizon wireless appreciates your initiative

But only sort of. See my new job (read: same job with more hours and more stress) requires me to be on my cell phone a lot. So I bumped up my plan to the unlimited option – pricy, but much cheaper than the overage charges – when I was precisely three minutes away from going over. I felt proactive and responsible. One less thing to stress about.

And then I got my $340 phone bill. Verizon wireless doesn’t exactly bother to TELL you this, but by changing your plan mid-billing cycle, they pro-rate your plan backwards. Let me try to explain better: original plan = 900 minutes/month of which I had used 897. When I changed the plan to unlimited, Verizon chose to cap my minutes at a partial month, and changed my monthly allowance to 600 and change.

By upping my plan to unlimited, I went from being just under the wire on the previous plan to nearly 300 minutes over. Plus the charge for the unlimited plan. Plus $50 in extra text messages. (Certain people who send a lot of text messages should just switch to Verizon. I’m just sayin’.)

Since I am an American, I did the only logical, American thing: I called to complain.

The Verizon woman, who sounded all of 14, helpfully explained the policy of charging me $200 for changing my cell phone plan. But, since she valued my attempt at “helping” Verizon, even though I misunderstood the policy, she submitted a reversal for the charges.

Now I am not one to argue with people who are in control of things like my money or my cell phone. But I thought it was a little ridiculous that she thought I was motivated by affection for my wireless service rather than attempting to avoid the insane overage charges that they then heaped onto my account anyway. When I last checked, about half the overage charges had been reversed.

Anyway, I have a bunch of work to do. It appears I will not have time to blog much between now and November 4, 2008, so please look for my memoir in stores in early 2009.


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