“like i’m a shadow!”

People think shows like The Office are funny because their lives are really like that. This is a significant realization for me. I sort of thought everyone watched and laughed because, like me, they could not imagine living in that world.
Then I started subletting an office. We have a tiny corner of a really tall office building. We have a nice view of the Rockies. And we have suitemates straight out of your worst corporate nightmares.
Yesterday, I walked into the shared kitchen area. There was a box of fudge on the table: “To the employees of Mr. R. George. From, Mrs. P. George”.
A second note on the box admonished, “Do not put this fudge in the fridge it will RUIN it! It must be kept at room temperature.”
Don’t give me a gift and tell me what to do with it, lady. I should also admit that the fudge was not for me and that I changed the names of the Georges to protect their privacy and because I can’t remember their real names anyway.
This is the kind of office where you get into Cold Wars over jelly beans. See, the jelly beans are for everyone to eat. But only if you eat them in moderation. If you have 30 staff who eat the jelly beans every day, that is no longer considered moderation. At this point you will no longer have access to any jelly beans. And you will be pulled aside by the landlord to discuss your jelly bean consumption.
I wish I was making this up. Anyway, this is all I’ve got for now. I’m kind of brain dead and have a lot of work still to do.

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